The Family Plot Blog
A Thanksgiving Prayer
Something to consider saying before your Thanksgiving Day feast. A Thanksgiving Prayer Oh, God, when I have food, help me to remember the hungry; When I have work, help me to remember the jobless; When I have a warm home, help me to remember the homeless; When I am without pain, help me to remember those who suffer; And remembering, help me to destroy my complacency and bestir my compassion. Make me concerned enough to help, by word and deed,...
Friday Funeral Film: The Descendants
Today's Friday Funeral Film, The Descendants starring George Clooney, helps start funeral planning conversations around advance directives and end-of-life issues. It also shows how a party can be the center of a good goodbye BEFORE someone dies. You also get a good look at cremated remains, if you've never seen them up close. Hawaiian land baron Matt King (Clooney) has been having marital issues with his wife Elizabeth. The film opens with her...
More on Alkaline Hydrolysis
There's an opinion column in today's Roanoke Times titled "Flush and bone: the future of alkaline hydrolysis in Virginia." It was written by Phil Olson, an assistant professor in the Department of Science and Technology in Society at Virginia Tech. Not only does he provide a great overview of state laws regarding the use of this emerging disposition method, he describes how it works and its environmental benefits. Here are a few paragraphs from...
Comparing Cremation and Alkaline Hydrolysis
"A clean green process" is how Jeff Edwards of Edwards Funeral Services describes Aquamation, his term for alkaline hydrolysis. In the YouTube video below, he shows his unit and explains how it is used for human bodies. Edwards is a funeral industry pioneer in the use alkaline hydrolysis for the disposition of bodies. He started offering it at his funeral home in Columbus, Ohio at the beginning of 2011 as an alternative to flame-based...
Remorse and Mortality
Erica Brown, a scholar in residence at the Jewish Federation of Greater Washington, wrote a thought-provoking opinion piece in Sunday's New York Times. Titled "Death: A Nice Opportunity for Regret," it ponders the combination of regret, repentance and the consideration of our own mortality. She wrote, "We rarely connect regret to death, but then we rarely connect death to anything because we'd rather talk about grocery shopping, gardening and...
Friday Funeral Film: The Six Wives of Henry Lefay
The Six Wives of Henry Lefay provides a lighthearted lesson in the serious business of funeral planning, wills, trusts and estate planning. It can open the door to discussions of funeral plans, inheritance, business succession, trusts, and pre-nup agreements.
Poem on Mortality: Notice by Steve Kowit
At today's Doorways of Santa Fe meeting, a gentleman who goes by the name Mudman shared this poem. It's a reminder that living and dying are all part of the same process. Notice - by Steve Kowit This evening, the sturdy Levi's I wore every day for over a year & which seemed to the end in perfect condition, suddenly tore. How or why I don't know, but there it was: a big rip at the crotch. A month ago my friend Nick walked off a racquetball...
ABQ Death Cafe November 7
Will the results of the election tomorrow prompt thoughts of mortality for you? Come and talk it out at the second Death Cafe in Albuquerque! This opportunity to talk about whatever is on your heart or mind about death will take place on Wednesday, November 7. So far, we have six people signed up to attend. The objective of Death Cafe is “To increase awareness of death with a view toward helping people make the most of their (finite) lives.” At...
Friday Funeral Film: Harold and Maude
http://youtu.be/hR-OojNoVDg By Gail Rubin, The Doyenne of Death® Whenever I mention funeral films, invariably those of the baby boomer generation cite Harold and Maude, a cult classic comedy film from 1971. Ironically, while this movie is remembered for the main characters attending the funerals of people they don't know (like me with my 30 Funerals in 30 Days Challenge), there are only two funerals depicted during the film. The message of...
Day of the Dead TV Interview
Yesterday, I was a guest on New Mexico Style, the morning talk show on KASA-TV in Albuquerque. Hosts Nikki and Kristen and I talked about how to build your own Day of the Dead altar or offrenda, to remember our loved ones and invite their spirits for a visit. We also talked about Create a Great Funeral Day, which was October 30, and the upcoming Death Cafe I'll be hosting on November 7. Here's video of the interview: http://youtu.be/dl0DawAg6XI...
Create a Great Funeral Day 2012
October 30, 2012 is the 13th annual Create a Great Funeral Day. Notwithstanding the super storm currently hammering the East Coast at the moment, this is an opportune time to start a funeral planning conversation. It's appropriate that Create a Great Funeral Day comes right before Halloween and the Day of the Dead celebration. Before ghosts can go a-haunting and spirits of the deceased can be celebrated, someone's gotta die. The idea behind...
Encountering the Dead in Real Life
In today's New York Times opinion section, there's a thought-provoking piece by Bess Lovejoy, author of the forthcoming book Rest in Pieces: The Curious Fates of Famous Corpses. The column, titled "The Dead Have Something to Tell You," provides a look at how death has drifted away from home, now handled by professionals. She also provides some good info on the growing use of hospice care in the U.S. Here are a few choice paragraphs from her...
Holyoke Library Talk
Recently uploaded a video of my talk on Monday night at the Holyoke Public Library to YouTube. Here's the description: Gail Rubin, author of A Good Goodbye: Funeral Planning for Those Who Don't Plan to Die, speaks at the Holyoke Public Library. She talks about the three people in the book's dedication (Norman Bleicher, Arthur Cohen and Wesley Vincent), Day of the Dead celebrations, her 30 Funerals in 30 Days project, including the spectacular...
Friday Funeral Film: Places in the Heart
I'm starting a series looking at funeral films every Friday! Get the low down on movies that have lessons on life, death and funeral planning. You'll also be able to see these articles in the Funeral Films section at www.AGoodGoodbye.com. Places in the Heart (1984-PG) stars Sally Field in her Oscar Award-winning performance as a widow in a Depression-era small town who has to learn how to make a living after her husband, the local sheriff, is...
The Young@Heart Chorus Rocks!
Rock and roll performed by senior citizens... who'd have thought it would have lasted 30 years? The Young@Heart Chorus just celebrated their 30th anniversary with three CD release concerts in their hometown of Northampton, Massachusetts. The minimum age to join is 72, and members must attend two two-hour rehearsals every week. New chorus members have to rehearse with the group for a year before they can perform. The constant rehearsing pays off...
Speaking Engagements in Western Massachusetts
I'm so excited to be heading out to Holyoke and Northampton in western Massachusetts tomorrow! Three speaking engagements are on the schedule - two presentations of Laughing in the Face of Death: Funny Films for Funeral Planning and a library talk focused on A Good Goodbye: Funeral Planning for Those Who Don't Plan to Die. Plus, it's peak leaf color time! Check out this image from a few days ago. Here's the lowdown on each event: Sunday,...
No Religious Affiliation on the Rise – Certified Celebrants Needed
A new survey by the Pew Research Center’s Forum on Religion & Public Life, conducted jointly with the PBS television program Religion & Ethics NewsWeekly, finds that the number of Americans who do not identify with any religion continues to grow at a rapid pace. One-fifth of the U.S. public – and a third of adults under 30 – are religiously unaffiliated today, the highest percentages ever in Pew Research Center polling. In the last five...
Massachusetts Death with Dignity Act
This Election Day, November 6, voters in Massachusetts will decide whether to adopt a Death with Dignity Act. The vote will determine whether a dying patient can obtain a medication from his or her physician, with the intent to bring about a faster, easier death, if the patient chooses. It's a topic we'll touch on during my talk at the Funeral Consumers Alliance (FCA) of Western Massachusetts meeting on October 21. Here's how the act reads: It...
Woody Allen on Living Life Backwards
Woody Allen has the best quotes about death. Here's some death humor that has been around a while, but it's worth repeating. WOODY ALLEN ON LIVING LIFE BACKWARDS "In my next life, I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch...
More News on the Frozen Dead Guy
Who says you can't make news when you're dead? Bredo Morstoel, the body at the center of the Frozen Dead Guy Days festival, has been in the headlines this past week. Bredo, who's been preserved in a Tuff Shed that houses his crypt of dry ice, has been there since 1993. It was the grand scheme of his grandson Trygve Bauge to put the 89-year-old in a deep freeze after he died of a heart condition in 1989. He's been paying Bo "The Iceman" Shaffer...
ABQ Death Cafe a Big Success!
The first Death Café west of the Mississippi was a resounding success. Held at a restaurant in Albuquerque on Sunday, people came together in a relaxed, confidential and safe setting to discuss mortality and death while eating delicious cake and cookies. “As The Doyenne of Death, I’m all about helping to start this conversation, and the Death Café is a wonderful way to take this topic out of the dark,” said Gail Rubin, coordinator of the event....