The Family Plot Blog
Emotional Wisdom Training Radio Interview
It takes laughter and a light touch to proactively address the one true inevitability of life: death. Today on Emotional Wisdom Training Radio, Gail Rubin will explain in an interview with host Kate Michels. "Gail and I are aligned in sharing the information that brings laughter to the events, incidents and accidents that we all experience during our life and death," said Michels. You can listen online or download the podcast from this link to...
Eulogies, Death Etiquette and “Fish in the Dark”
Larry David on Broadway Theater, 'Seinfeld' and Death Etiquette in Sunday's New York Times Arts & Leisure section provided some interesting thoughts on how people react to death. David was a major force behind the "Seinfeld" television program and stars in HBO's "Curb Your Enthusiasm." He has written and is starring in his Broadway comedy "Fish in the Dark." He plays the son of a family patriarch on his deathbed. Here is part of the Q&A...
A Will for the Woods on PBS Stations Feb. 24
A Will for the Woods, the award-winning documentary about green burial, will debut on selected PBS stations on Tuesday, February 24 at 8:00 p.m. ET/ 7:00 p.m. CT (check your local listings). This 60-minute version of the documentary is airing on the America ReFramed series through WorldChannel.org. A Will for the Woods focuses on musician, folk dancer, and psychiatrist Clark Wang as he prepares for his own death and green burial. He's...
Albuquerque Death Cafe Report
Yesterday's Albuquerque Death Cafe was one of the best we've ever had. Comments included "fun," "thought-provoking," "interesting," "emotional," "needed," "wonderful," and "a stupendous gathering of folks... quite rewarding!" Twenty five people attended, with two people coming from far away Las Cruces and one person from Moriarty. While it was a little crowded in the living room and dining room at my home (Lola had to sit out in the hall), the...
A Short Memorial Service Template
Sometimes, a long, drawn-out memorial service isn't needed, but you want to say something about the deceased. Here's a structure for a short, but meaningful service that covers the "Four Rs" of a good memorial service: Recognize the death, Remember the person, Reaffirm beliefs and Release the spirit. Feel free to add readings and play music that reflects the spirit of the person who died to add depth and emotional impact. Recognize: We are...
News and Notes: Facebook Legacy Pages
After you die, you can now leave someone in charge of your Facebook account. On February 12, Facebook announced a new policy for creating Legacy pages. Stories on NPR, Time and other media, including from Facebook directly, gave the details. Previously, if a person died without someone else knowing their password, there was no way to make changes - you'd still get their birthday notices, people could make friend requests (not that they'd get a...
Event: March 10 NM Financial Planners Association
The Spring 2015 meeting of the Financial Planners Association New Mexico Chapter features Gail Rubin presenting Estate Planning Hollywood Style: How to minimize end-of-life planning resistance with humor and film clips. The entire meeting takes place on Tuesday, March 10, 2015 from 8:00 a.m. to noon at the Hilton Garden Inn, 6510 Americas Parkway, Albuquerque, NM. Attorney Vickie Wilcox will present an update on financial and health care Powers...
Psalms for Funerals: The 90th
Psalm 90: O God, You have been our refuge in every generation. Before the mountains came into being, before You brought forth the earth and the world, from eternity to eternity You are God. You return us to dust: You decreed: “Return, you mortals!” For in Your sight a thousand years are as yesterday when it has passed, as a watch in the night. You engulf us in sleep; we are like grass that renews itself: at daybreak it flourishes anew; at dusk...
A Star Wars-Themed Funeral for a Big Fan
Gordon Deacon was a huge Star Wars fan. Appropriately, he had a Star Wars-themed funeral in Cardiff, Wales, after his death at the age of 58. On an overcast day, an honor guard of Imperial Storm Troopers led the funeral procession as his casket was brought by horse-drawn carriage to the church. A vicar chanted traditional prayers as his body was carried into the church. Mr. Deacon's widow, Marilyn, 54, said: “He was mad on Star Wars. We went to...
Chaplain Karen Kaplan Speaks About Hospice, Book
Encountering the Edge: What People Told Me Before They Died gives readers a look at the inner workings of today's hospice services, as well as a glimpse at what people most care about in their final days. The author, Chaplain Karen Kaplan, was my guest on A Good Goodbye Radio and the interview is now available on FuneralRadio.com. Chaplain Karen B. Kaplan was one of the first 200 ordained female rabbis in the world. She served as a hospice...
PBS FRONTLINE Show Tonight Examines End-of-Life and Medicine
On PBS tonight, the FRONTLINE program features end-of-life issues, death and dying in America with Being Mortal, the same title as the best-selling book by surgeon Dr. Atul Gawande. Being Mortal looks at the relationships doctors have with patients in the end stages of their lives. It’s an area where the U.S. health care system is falling short, according to Gawande. The story of Brittany Maynard — a 29-year-old woman diagnosed with terminal...
Even Young Adults Need End-of-Life Planning
In today's Dear Abby column, the writer is peeved that Mom is insisting her kids, who are in their late 20s, do end-of-life planning: wills, advance medical directives and power of attorney designations. The mother works as a certified nursing assistant for hospice, and she's been assisting the terminally-ill for 16 years. NEWS FLASH: If you are 18 years of age or older, you are legally considered an adult (even though you may not be able to...
Event: Feb. 21 Albuquerque Death Cafe
The next Albuquerque Death Cafe will be held on Saturday, February 21, 2015 from 2:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. at Gail Rubin’s home. At the Death Cafe, people come together in a relaxed, confidential and safe setting to discuss death and end-of-life issues, drink tea (or your favorite beverage) and eat delicious cake or cookies. If you want to attend, send an email to Gail [at] AGoodGoodbye.com to RSVP for the address and directions. Or join the...
News and Notes: The Day After Groundhog Day
The 1993 comedy film Groundhog Day stars Bill Murray as Phil Connors, an arrogant, self-centered weatherman who relives the same day over and over again until he learns some valuable life lessons. Since yesterday was the day Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow, forecasting six more weeks of winter, at least we can enjoy the life lessons the movie holds for us. http://youtu.be/tSVeDx9fk60 At first, when Phil realizes no matter what he does, he...
Nationwide Super Bowl Ad on Child Death Disturbs Viewers
Among all the funny and tear-jerking commercials aired during the Super Bowl yesterday, who would have thought there would be an ad on avoiding accidental deaths of children? While I'm all for starting the conversation on end-of-life issues and funeral planning, this was a serious miscalculation by Nationwide Insurance's ad agency. A young boy talks about how he won't grow up, get cooties from a girl, learn to fly, travel the world or get...
Funeralities Realities Part 3
Here's the last installment of the great information from guest blogger Gary Newman, maven of finances related to end-of-life issues. Recalling that, because dying is a regular part of living, and nobody yet has told us how a way to avoid it, we need to think about and plan for it, just like everything else. And recalling that we all know our DOB’s, but not our DOD’s, we’d better get on with our dialogue about it. More of my thoughts, to add to...
Funeralities Realities Part 2
Here's part two of the great information from guest blogger Gary Newman, maven of finances related to end-of-life issues. If you’ve found a way to avoid dying, please tell us how. If not, and because dying is part of living, like all the other phases of life, the events that it triggers need deciding and planning. Last time we started to explore ideas, so let’s continue with some of mine. How about yours? In planning a funeral or memorial...
Funeralities Realities Part 1
Enjoy this guest blog post from Gary Newman, maven of finances related to end-of-life issues. “Just as talking about sex won’t make you pregnant, talking about funerals won’t make you dead. Both you and your family will benefit from the conversation. So, let’s get the conversation started” -– -- Wisdom from nationally-acclaimed thanatologist Gail Rubin, heading up her website, www.agoodgoodbye.com. President Kennedy received a multi-day...
Aid-in-Dying Advocate Shares Her Story
Barbara Mancini is an emergency room nurse who did not seek to become an aid-in-dying advocate. But she is one now, after her outrageous experience with the criminal justice system over this sensitive end-of-life issue. On February 13, 2013, she was arrested for giving her terminally ill father his vial of prescription morphine, which he had requested and promptly drank. Two hours later, the hospice nurse called the cops, her 93 year old father...
Event: Jan. 25 Barbara Mancini Compassion and Choices Talk
Barbara Mancini was featured on a 60 Minutes episode about end-of-life related to patients with terminal illnesses. This loving daughter faced a felony charge in Pennsylvania for helping provide home hospice care for her dying father. She was arrested and prosecuted for simply handing her terminally-ill father his morphine. A hospice worker was the one who called the police. She is speaking Sunday, January 25 from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m. at the...
News and Notes: Estate Planning Hollywood Myths and Facts
Over the holidays, I created a quirky new 2-minute video welcoming visitors to the A Good Goodbye website. If you haven't visited lately, you might want to check it out. The way the movies portray it, wills are supposed to cover funeral plans in addition to the distribution of assets. Unfortunately, family members may die before doing any estate planning. Even with a will, plans can go awry. Next week, I'll be presenting “Estate Planning:...