The Family Plot Blog
Why You Need to Dictate What’s to Become of Your Ashes
The cremated remains of Dorothy Parker -- humorist, writer, critic, defender of human and civil rights -- are buried in a memorial grove next to the NAACP headquarters in Baltimore - right beside the parking lot. Her remains are far from New York City, the place she grew up in and loved. Dorothy Parker left instructions that she be cremated, but she left no instructions as to what was to be done with her ashes. She died in 1967 at the age of...
Urns in Style at CANA
At the CANA convention, Michi Kustra, owner of Urns In Style, shows the glass, ceramic and metal urns she offers through funeral homes and to the general public on her website, www.UrnsInStyle.com. And what stylish urns they are! Their handmade glass urns are very substantial, with a glowing quality, and made in the United States. They also offer ceramic urns with beautiful textures and finishes and contemporary metal urns in various sizes and...
President Carter, Please Consider Hospice
Is it wise for a 90 year-old with metastatic cancer to pursue aggressive treatment? I respectfully suggest former President Jimmy Carter consider hospice or palliative care over chemotherapy or surgery. He can set an example from which the public can benefit. President Carter revealed on August 12 he has cancer that has spread to other parts of his body and he plans to pursue treatment at Emory Healthcare in Atlanta. A more complete public...
Aid in Dying in New Mexico Ruling Reversal
On Tuesday, August 11, a divided New Mexico Court of Appeals reversed a court ruling that allowed mentally competent, terminally ill patients to choose their own time to die with aid from a physician. This means the January 2014 ruling by 2nd Judicial District Chief Judge Nan Nash, which permanently barred the state from prosecuting a physician who provides aid in dying for end-of-life, no longer provides protection from prosecution. Next stop:...
News and Notes: Your Burning Questions Answered
This past week, I've written some interesting posts on information gleaned at the Cremation Association of North America's recent convention and expo. You can learn about the latest on cremation rates, differences between cremation rituals in Asia and the U.S., what dental gold is worth and other burning questions you didn't know to ask. Links to blog posts follow below. The TEDxABQ Main Event, where I'll be speaking about pre-need discussions...
New Cremation Statistics from CANA
Guess what? Cremation rates in America continue to grow, but not as fast as it has in recent years. We're now at a national average cremation rate of 46.7%, based on provisional data that's subject to change. A 50% national rate is projected to be reached in the next 12-18 months, possibly by early 2016. Every year, the Cremation Association of North America (CANA) issues its report on statistics and trends on cremation rates in America and...
Marble Urn Vault for Cremated Remains
The theme of memorialization came up a lot at the recent Cremation Association of North America (CANA) convention. A vast majority of people scatter ashes, but about a third of the population choose burial for cremated remains. And there were many innovations displayed at the expo to support permanent placement of cremated remains. Batesville introduced the new Vanderbur Cultured Marble urn vault, which can be placed above ground or buried. It...
Dental Gold and Cremation
One of the questions that frequently come up in my public presentations is "What's the value of the gold crowns in my mouth and will that cover the cost of my cremation?" At the recent Cremation Association of North America (CANA) convention, I met Kevin McKay with DDS Refining, a company that refines the precious metals in dental prosthetics, who helped answer these questions. The short answer, if you've got six to eight gold crowns in your...
The Difference Between Ossuaries and Columbaria
If you aren't in the cemetery, cremation or funeral business, it's understandable you wouldn't know the difference between an ossuary and a columbarium - or even what they are. A columbarium (the plural is columbaria), is a structure that houses urns holding cremated remains. They can vary in size from a wall or free-standing structure in a cemetery to an elaborate building with thousands of niches to permanently memorialize and house cremated...
Comparing Cremations in the U.S. and Asian Countries
Jeff Chancellor, CFSP, is Director of Education, Training and Research for Eckels, a provider of funeral service products worldwide. Over the course of his long career in funeral service, Jeff has experienced cremation in more than a dozen countries on three continents. He's especially knowledgeable about funeral traditions in Asia. In this short video recorded at the annual convention of the Cremation Association of North America, Chancellor...
Aug. 26: We Can Do That? New Trends in Death Care
Gail Rubin, CT, speaks at the Albuquerque Del Norte Rotary Club meeting on Wednesday, August 26 at noon. Her talk is titled “We Can Do That? New Trends in Death Care." The modern funeral is changing. Cremation is on the rise, and options abound. Learn about creative celebrations of life and what you need to know BEFORE there's a death in the family in this eye-opening talk. The meeting will take place at the Sheraton Uptown, northeast corner of...
Glass Cremation Art at CANA
Americans have been cremating our dead since at least 1913, when CANA, the Cremation Association of North America, started. The organization was formed to promote the "modern way" and the "safe and hygienic way" of dealing with a dead human body. At that time, and up into the early 1920's, cremation was the choice of the wealthy and well-educated. All crematories were located on cemetery property and stately columbariums were built to house and...
News and Notes: The Latest on Cremation at CANA
This week, the Cremation Association of North America (CANA) holds its 97th annual convention in San Diego. I'll be there to report on cremation issues such as body donation, mercury emissions, environmental impact, and cremation rates. YouTube videos on developments displayed at the expo to come! The San Jose Mercury News just ran a story about weird job titles, and the Doyenne of Death was featured! I'm in the company of titles like Snack...
NY Times Editorial on End-of-Life Care
In Sunday's New York Times, the newspaper's editorial board published this opinion piece, "Helping Patients and Doctors Talk About Death." Kudos to the New York Times for all of the many thought-provoking pieces they've run lately on end-of-life issues. Here's the editorial: Medicare announced plans this month to reimburse doctors for talking with patients about what treatments they want — and don’t want — toward the end of life. This sensible,...
October 6 and 7: Two Talks in Maryland
Gail Rubin, CT, will be speaking in the Washington, D.C. area in early October. The author and host of A Good Goodbye: Funeral Planning for Those Who Don't Plan to Die, Ms. Rubin is a Certified Thanatologist (a death educator) who uses funny films to teach about serious end-of-life subjects. Tuesday, October 6, 10:30 a.m. to noon "Jewish Funeral Traditions on Film" presentation at Temple Beth Ami, 14330 Travilah Road, Rockville, Maryland....
The Palliative Care Four Questions
Being Mortal, Atul Gawande's acclaimed book, subtitled Medicine and What Matters in the End, helps illuminate those dark corners where fears of death lurk. While medicine has made great life-saving strides over the past few decades, we humans still have a 100% mortality rate. There is no cure for old age. With only 30% of adults preparing advance medical directives, it's so much harder to talk about end-of-life issues when no one's discussing...
The TEDxABQ-Toastmasters Connection
This story recently appeared on the website for District 23 Toastmasters, covering New Mexico and neighboring parts of Texas, including Amarillo and El Paso. Toastmaster Gail Rubin Selected for TEDxABQ Kudos to Gail Rubin, ACB, for her selection as a speaker for TEDxABQ 2015. The new President of Albuquerque Challenge, Rubin identified her Toastmasters experience over the past four years as a key element to landing one of 20 sought-after...
Muslim Burial Ground Misconceptions
Residents of Farmersville, Texas, about 35 miles north of Dallas, are fighting to prevent the establishment of a Muslim cemetery on an empty strip of land next to a highway because of misconceptions about threats it could pose to the community. To help illuminate what Muslim burial entails, Gail Rubin, the Doyenne of Death® offers these insights: The funeral traditions of Muslims and Jews are remarkably similar. Both Jewish and Muslim burial...
Digital Address Books and Death
The New York Times' Sunday Review section featured on the front page "My Digital Cemetery" by Rob Walker. He started by stating he has 2,743 contacts in his digital address book, which stretches back two decades to the dawn of digital devices - in his case, a 1996 Palm Pilot. That seems like a lot. He admits they've been passed along with each new device he's acquired. He's interviewed a lot of people over those 20 years, and their contact...
August 22: Albuquerque Death Cafe
Mark your calendar for the next Albuquerque Death Cafe on Saturday, August 22, 2015 from 2:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. The event will take place at Gail Rubin's home - RSVP through the Meetup Group or post a note in the comment section. Click here to go to the Meetup page. The address will be provided to those who indicate they will attend. The objective of the Death Cafe is “To increase awareness of death with a view to helping people make the most...
News and Notes: TEDxABQ and Mortality Minute
Exciting news: Presenting a TED talk is a dream come true for many speakers. I've been selected to be one of 20 speakers at TEDxABQ, New Mexico's independently organized TED event. TED talks (TED stands for Technology, Entertainment and Design) offer big ideas and inspirational thoughts from a wide range of people. My big idea relates to encouraging preneed funeral planning and preparing advance medical directives. More than 2,000 people will...