The Family Plot Blog
An Honest Obituary for an Evil Man
One of the life lessons death teaches us is that we are remembered by how we treat other people. This obituary featured on the website of the Carnes Funeral Home in South Houston is going viral. It is notable for its honest appraisal of a life lived as a warning to others. As Shakespeare wrote in Julius Caesar, "The evil that men do lives after them; the good is oft interred with their bones." Leslie Ray "Popeye" Charping was born in Galveston,...
March 10-12: Frozen Dead Guy Days!
More than 20,000 people will attend the 16th annual Frozen Dead Guy Days (FDGD) festival in Nederland, Colorado, 17 miles west of Boulder, March 10-12, 2017. Reader’s Digest and readers of USA Today named FDGD one of the top five winter festivals in the country. This quirky celebration of all things dead and frozen receives national media coverage every year. The event features coffin races, a parade of hearses, costumed polar plunging, frozen...
Advocates Lobby for New Mexico End-of-Life Options Bill
The New Mexico State Legislature is currently in session, and today supporters of physician aid in dying for terminally ill patients converged on the Roundhouse in Santa Fe in support of House Bill 171, the End-of-Life Options Act. The bill was introduced by State Rep. Deborah Armstrong (D-Albuquerque) and Rep. Bill McCamley (D-Las Cruces). Rep. Armstrong said, "The End-of-Life Options Act would allow mentally capable, terminally ill adults in...
Consumers Need to Focus On Funerals
If you've been avoiding the topic of pre-need funeral planning, you need to know about this week's NPR investigative story focused on how difficult it can be to get a handle on funeral costs. The two-part series ran on All Things Considered and Morning Edition. Click here to access the stories through The Family Plot Blog. It’s not that funeral establishments don’t want you to know what they charge for their services. My recent story, Eight...
What Funeral Homes Don’t Want You To Know
National Public Radio (NPR) News just ran a two-part investigative series on All Things Considered and Morning Edition about how hard it can be to get a firm handle on funeral costs. As an advocate for pre-need funeral planning, my advice is to listen to these stories and educate yourself about local funeral home costs BEFORE you need to use their services for the death of a family member. It's not that funeral homes don't want you to know what...
Eight Things Funeral Directors Want You To Know
Let’s face it – funerals are the parties no one wants to plan. And most people only interact with funeral directors at funerals, when they are appropriately solicitous, supportive, and somber. Because so many people avoid discussing death, few realize funeral directors are some of the kindest, funniest people you will ever meet. If you were simply chatting with a funeral director over a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, what would he or she...
March 18: Conference Keynote Living With & Beyond Cancer
Gail Rubin, CT, is the kickoff keynote speaker at the 6th Annual Conference of Living With & Beyond Cancer. Her talk is titled "A Good Goodbye: Funeral Planning for Those Who Don't Plan to Die." Rubin is a breast cancer survivor who uses humor and funny films to teach about preparing for end-of-life issues, whether you've had cancer or not. The conference takes place on Saturday, March 18th, 2017, from 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. at the Central...
Celebrating the History of African-American Funeral Traditions
In honor of February’s Black History Month, enjoy this fascinating background about African-American funeral traditions and how they evolved. Funeral director and funeral home owner Allen Dave presented this information about African-American funeral service traditions at the 2016 International Cemetery, Cremation and Funeral Association (ICCFA) University. For 25 years, Dave ran a successful wedding event planning business. He became a funeral...
Feb. 19: Next ABQ Death Cafe
Mark your calendars to attend the next Albuquerque Death Cafe on Sunday, February 19, 2017 from 3:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m. at Gail Rubin's home. Send a note to Gail [at] AGoodGoodbye.com to RSVP and get directions. Refreshments will be provided. The event is free and donations are welcome. The objective of the Death Cafe is "To increase awareness of death with a view to helping people make the most of their (finite) lives." It's all about an...
Introducing the “Dump-A-Drawer” Way to Declutter
Overwhelmed by clutter every time you open a drawer, a cabinet or a closet? Try Gail Rubin's "Dump-A-Drawer" approach to decluttering! Frustrated that I couldn't find a specific item in my desk drawer due to an abundance of clutter, this approach helped clear the frustration in a jiffy. Step 1: Remove the drawer with its contents inside. Step 2: Dump the contents of the drawer into a cardboard box. Step 3: Pick out the items that you actually...
Mary Tyler Moore Plans Chuckles’ Funeral
Mary Tyler Moore's death yesterday at the age of 80 prompted an outpouring of loving tributes in print and on television. Adding to the adulation, here are three scenes from the Emmy Award-winning episode of The Mary Tyler Moore Show, "Chuckles Bites the Dust." This entire episode, available on Amazon.com, is an excellent way to get funeral planning conversations started. Chuckles, the clown at the local Minneapolis TV station where Mary...
Battling Cancer and the Problem of Hope
Dr. Leslie Blackhall, Head of Palliative Care at the University of Virginia, provides a wonderful look at our human tendency to pretend we aren't going to die, and the challenge of clinging to "hope" while undergoing cancer treatment in this TEDxCharlottesville talk. She believes that accepting dying as a part of life allows us to achieve a fuller and richer life with the days that we live. She says, "It is optional and unnecessary suffering,...
Why Include a Thanatologist in Your Circle of Life Experts?
Gary Newman, a regular columnist in the Myrtle Beach Sun News (a.k.a. MyrtleBeachOnline.com), just wrote a lovely column that included a favorable mention of my new book, KICKING THE BUCKET LIST: 100 Downsizing and Organizing Things to Do Before You Die. Here's the first part of his column, which appeared on Sunday, January 22, 2017. "Who's my thanatologist?…My what?" Some bright guru exclaimed: "Dying's part of living." No kidding, guru! Sure,...
The Times, They Are A-Changing
There's a new administration taking power in Washington, D.C. this Friday. And, as Bob Dylan sang decades ago, the times, they are a changin'. One thing about life - as long as we live, there will be changes. Changes don't matter much to the dead. Many people say, "I don't care what you do after I'm dead. I won't be there." This can be very hurtful to the family and friends who love this person. If people didn't love you, they wouldn't mourn...
Use This Gesture of Respect to Reap Big Benefits
At the International Cemetery Cremation and Funeral Association's (ICCFA) summer University, in the College of International Studies, students learn a rich combination of cultural and religious funeral traditions, presented by experienced industry professionals. Here's one cultural insight that can improve business for any funeral home or cemetery, or any service business. In the session on Chinese American funeral traditions, Bob Yount,...
Three Myths About Burial Insurance
Anthony Martin, owner and CEO of Choice Mutual, authored today's guest blog post on "Three Myths About Burial Insurance." It's almost impossible for any industry to be completely devoid of inaccuracies and misinformation. The internet only exacerbates this problem given how fast and far it enables the dissemination of half truths – particularly in the burial insurance market. The drawback of this misinformation is that it influences the end...
Review: The New York Times Book of the Dead
You know you’ve arrived – and departed – when your life is chronicled in a news obituary in The New York Times. The New York Times Book of the Dead, which pulls together 320 print and 10,000 digital obituaries of extraordinary people, also illustrates how the news obituary has changed since the newspaper’s first such article in 1851. The New York Times Book of the Dead and its online counterpart offer a valuable resource for researchers,...
You Can Ditch Old Issues in the New Year
Welcome to 2017! Perhaps you made some goals or resolutions for the New Year. What's the difference between goals and resolutions? You may resolve to lose weight, make or save more money, or simply enjoy your life more. But how do you measure your progress? My fellow Toastmaster TK O'Geary just did a speech in our Albuquerque Challenge Toastmasters Club on how setting goals is more effective than making resolutions. Goals are: Specific. It...
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[Video] How to Create an Iconic Jaguar Hearse
I've written about Ken Roberts a few times on this blog. He's the automobile enthusiast who recreated the Jaguar hearse from the 1971 cult classic film, Harold and Maude. Read all about it in A Real Jaguar Hearse Inspired by Harold and Maude (Dec. 23, 2015) and How to Recreate a Famous Jaguar Hearse (Aug. 22, 2016). In this video interview, illustrated with selected clips from Harold and Maude, Ken Roberts reveals: Why he decided to undertake...
What to Know About Four Remarkable Religions’ Funeral Traditions
Many people have questions about the religious funeral traditions for adherents of the Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist and Greek Orthodox faiths. These four separate podcasts on A Good Goodbye Radio with host Gail Rubin, CT, offer in-depth insights. Jewish Funeral Traditions Even though Jewish funeral traditions are thousands of years old, many Reform and Conservative Jews today are unfamiliar with those rites. David Zinner, founder and executive...
Insights Magazine Profiles Gail Rubin, CT
"Unfinished Business," an article by Diane Bosser in the Fall 2016 issue of Insights Magazine, the publication for Montgomery College alumni and friends, focuses on Gail Rubin, CT, The Doyenne of Death®. A pioneering death educator, Rubin graduated from Montgomery College in 1978 with an AA degree in Radio, Television and Film. She puts her degree to work by using funny film clips to supplement the humorous presentations she makes on...