Recently, two widows were at lunch. When the check came, the more recently bereaved asked her friend if she could cover the bill, saying that she was a little strapped at the moment.
Concerned, the friend asked, “But, you just got a $20,000 insurance settlement. What happened?”
“Well,” said the new widow, “expenses were high. It cost $8,000 for the funeral and another $2,000 for the casket. Then, there were $3,000 in remaining medical expenses and estate taxes. Finally, there was the $7,000 for the stone.”
“My goodness!” exclaimed the friend. “How big was the stone?”
“About three carats,” said the widow, extending her hand.
(I’ve heard a variation on this one where the deceased husband had said he wanted the biggest stone possible, yet when the widow visits the grave with her girlfriend, she comments that it’s actually a rather modest marker. “Oh, but I did get the biggest stone I could afford,” says the widow, extending her hand.)