The Family Plot Blog
Leaving It to Chance: Estate Planning Lessons from “Being There”
Over the weekend, we screened the 1979 film Being There with Peter Sellers. As a Mortality Movie, it's one of those deceptively quiet films that starts with gentle comedy and ends up opening big conversations about power, vulnerability, and what happens when someone dies without a plan. On the surface, the story is simple. Chance is a sheltered, naive gardener who has spent his entire life inside a Washington, DC townhouse, tending plants and...
98.6 Mortality Movies to See Before You Die Coming Soon!
A New Book, Two Covers, and 142 Movies and TV Shows That Get People Talking About Death I’m happy to officially share some news that has been a long time coming and has involved a truly unreasonable number of movies. My new book, 98.6 Mortality Movies to See Before You Die, is now available for pre-sale, and yes, readers get to choose their cover. Because life is short and choices should be fun. 👉 Pre-sale...
Chuckles Bites the Dust: How to Talk About Death Without Ruining Dinner
If you only had 30 minutes to help someone feel less weird about talking through funeral wishes, what would you show them? A spreadsheet?A legal document?A pamphlet with too many euphemisms and not enough humanity? Hard pass. My top pick, every time, is the 1975 Mary Tyler Moore Show episode, “Chuckles Bites the Dust.” Yes, the one with the clown.Yes, the one where Mary Richards laughs uncontrollably at the funeral.And yes, the one that somehow...
Critical Care: When the ICU Meets Kafka (and the Billing Department)
Critical Care (1997) is going to be my next Mortality Movie Night selection on February 7. Register through this Meetup event. If you’ve ever wondered what would happen if a hospital ethics committee, an insurance company, and a dysfunctional family were locked in a room together and told to decide whether someone lives or dies, congratulations, you’ve basically described Critical Care. Directed by Sidney Lumet (because of course it is) and...
Big Hero 6: A Superhero Movie That Sneaks in a Grief Lesson
Big Hero 6 Big Hero 6 looks like a turbo-charged animated superhero romp, at first glance. There are flying robots, neon cityscapes, and a team of unlikely crime fighters who look like they wandered in from very different Halloween parties. But then something happens. Someone dies. And suddenly this “kids’ movie” turns into one of the most emotionally honest portrayals of grief Disney has ever released, wrapped in vinyl armor and a gentle voice...
Gravity: Grief, Survival, and the Courage to Re‑Enter Life
Gravity (2013 – PG‑13, 1 hr. 31 min.) may look like a white‑knuckle sci‑fi disaster epic, but at its core it is a profoundly human story about loss, mourning, and the slow, deliberate choice to keep living. Yes, there are spinning astronauts, orbital debris moving at ungodly speeds, and George Clooney doing what George Clooney does best (calm competence with a side of charm). But the real vacuum in Gravity isn’t space—it’s the hollowed‑out...
The Top Three Mortality Movies of 2025
As The Doyenne of Death and expert on Mortality Movies, I’m often asked if I spend all my time thinking about death. My answer? Of course not. I also think about films and TV shows, snacks, and how avoiding conversations about mortality tends to make people more anxious, not less. Which brings me to 2025: a year that quietly delivered some of the most thoughtful, emotionally resonant films about mortality we’ve seen in a long time. These...
Remembering Rob Reiner: Love, Laughter, and the Movies That Made Us Feel Alive
There are moments in life — and in death — that leave us blinking at the horizon of our own mortality, wondering how something so sudden, so shockingly unfair could happen to souls so beloved. This past weekend brought just such a moment with the tragic deaths of actor-director Rob Reiner and his wife, Michele Singer Reiner, found stabbed in their Brentwood, California home in an apparent homicide. They were discovered on December 14, 2025; Rob...
Medical Aid in Dying: We offer our pets a good death, why not our people?
Medical aid in dying is misunderstood. This TEDxABQ talk presented by Gail Rubin, the Doyenne of Death®, on September 27, 2025, helps dispel myths and misconceptions. Here is the video of the talk, and the written version below. Medical Aid in Dying If you’re younger than 70, you’ve probably said, “IF I die.” News Flash: The mortality rate is holding steady at 100%. It’s not IF but...
The Twilight Zone: The First Mortality Movies TV Series
The Twilight Zone, created and hosted by Rod Serling, was basically the first Mortality Movies TV series. The series, which aired on CBS from 1959 to 1964, presented a range of stories in the fantasy, horror and science fiction genres. The characters often dealt with disturbing or unusual events, an experience described as entering “the Twilight Zone.” If you are of certain age, you'll remember those ominous words uttered by Serling at the...
Holiday Mortality Movies: Festive Films that Stare Down the Reaper
Yes, there are Christmas Mortality Movies. The holidays come loaded with tinsel, tradition, and, if we’re honest, a surprising amount of existential angst. Year’s end nudges us into inventory mode: Who am I? What have I done? Did I really send that reply-all? Enter the Mortality Movie, a holiday staple that uses ghosts, near-death detours, and cosmic do-overs to help us take stock, then sit back down with the people we love while the cocoa...
On Screen with the Ancestors: Films that Celebrate Día de los Muertos
Hola, amigos de la muerte (and life)! As we approach Día de los Muertos, that gorgeously bittersweet time when the veil between worlds gets as thin as tissue paper, it’s time to talk movies that really get the concept of this special time: the joy, the annual remembrances, and yes, the bones. Día de los Muertos isn’t Halloween’s moody cousin. It’s a vibrant reunion, where memory is a passport and love is the visa. Filmmakers have been drawn to...
Sitting Shiva on Screen: Jewish Funeral Traditions in Four Films
Jewish Funerals on Film Movies can be a safe, even entertaining, way to explore the rituals that surround death, and few traditions are as rich, layered, and surprisingly funny as Jewish mourning customs. Four films, My Mexican Shivah, Nora’s Will, This Is Where I Leave You, and The Cemetery Club, offer heartfelt, humorous windows into grief, community, and continuity. Note that the spelling of "Shiva" varies with or without the "h" on the end....
Love, Loss, and Loyalty: What Pets (Especially Dogs) Teach Us About Mortality
Few experiences in life confront us with the inevitability of death like the loss of a beloved pet, especially dogs. Whether it’s a rambunctious puppy, a dignified Akita, or a cherished companion of any species, pets offer a unique lens into grief, attachment, and the meaning of life itself. Three films — Gates of Heaven (1978), Marley & Me (2008), and Hachi: A Dog’s Tale (2009) — illuminate this lesson with humor, heart, and haunting...
Video: A Moving Memorial Scattering Ashes Along Route 66
Scattering ashes of a cremated loved one is a popular request. But how many of you have actually done that? I just took a road trip from Las Vegas to Albuquerque. The origin of the trip was to go see The Wizard of Oz, newly remastered for an interactive experience at Sphere at the Venetian in Las Vegas, Nevada. My friend Tall Dave suggested seeing the film there, and said he was thinking of driving. That got me to thinking.... My brother-in-law...
Wait, The Wizard of Oz is a Mortality Movie?
I’m so excited to be going to see enhanced, interactive version of the 1939 film The Wizard of Oz at the Sphere in Las Vegas soon! It had been a while since I’d seen it, so I scheduled it for a Mortality Movie Night at my home. Is this children’s classic a Mortality Movie? You bet your ruby red slippers it is! Think about it - dead witches, the Munchkin Coroner making the pronouncement, the hourglass with the red sand which spells doom for...
Podcast: Greg Barnsdale on Do Not Ignore Your Mortality
On The Doyenne of Death Podcast: Facing the Inevitable, a Conversation with Greg Barnsdale If there’s one thing in life we can all count on, it’s death. And yet—despite a 100% guaranteed outcome—most of us prefer to treat it like that awkward relative at Thanksgiving: ignore it and hope it goes away. Spoiler alert: it won’t. That’s why I’m thrilled to share my latest episode of...
Mortality Movies About Medical Treatment and End of Life Issues
Mortality Movies can be sorted into many different topic areas. Some films cover multiple categories. Today’s list covers Gail Rubin's recommendations for films related to medical treatment and end-of-life issues. Subscribe to her Substack column, Mortality Movies with The Doyenne of Death® to be kept up to date on new recommendations! YouTube clips available online are also included, so you can get a feel for these Mortality Movies. If you...
Gail Rubin at TEDxABQ 2025: Exploring Curiosity in All Its Dimensions
On Saturday, September 27, 2025, TEDxABQ will return with a bold new theme: Curiosity. This year’s event will be held at Albuquerque’s immersive Electric Playhouse, transforming the traditional TEDx experience into a multi-sensory journey of ideas, perspectives, and human connection. And one of the speakers will be Gail Rubin! From 1:00 PM to 6:30 PM, 15 speakers will share thought-provoking talks that challenge assumptions, spark dialogue, and...
Mortality Movies Featuring Funerals and Funeral Directors
The Doyenne of Death loves movies! I love how they can be used to get people to discuss death and hopefully take action to plan ahead for our 100% mortality rate. Over the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing my lists of films, starting with those involving funerals, funeral directors, and the mortuary business in general. Got any additions to add to the list? Post in the comments! Also included are selected film clips that can give you some...
Seeking Voices: Share Your Experience with Death and Dying in a Complex World
Death Experience Survey Have you experienced the death of someone close to you in the past year? Would you consider sharing your thoughts on what makes a "good death"? If so, the Organization in a Complex Future project invites you to take part in an important new survey that explores personal experiences and perspectives around death and dying. This initiative is part of a broader effort to better understand how individuals navigate the...